Half a dozen things you can do, now that the 'Food' is secure

Now that the Food Security Bill has been passed, here are a few things honest, hard-working and more importantly, tax-paying citizens of India need to start doing. But before that, let me outline a few ways in which the FSB will impact us.

Rice, Wheat and some cereals will be cheaper. But not for you, because whatever available grain is there in this country, will go to the 67% of the country that you do not fall into. Now with the grains so cheap, there will be wastage and over consumption by those who get them. We don't have a problem with a little over consumption, I mean, as long as somebody's gob is getting stuffed (Not that it will be doing them any good, because they will still be malnourished from lack of most essential nutrients). But the wastage through an acknowledged under-prepared public distribution system means that whatever is produced in the country will go to 67%. The other 33% will have to find their own grub from elsewhere. Veggies will probably become a thing of the past (or again, too expensive), as farmers will be assured that their grains will be bought. Fruits will probably become so rare that your kid's books will have A for Anaaj (grain) instead of A for Apple. So basically, everything will become damn expensive, inflation will go crazy, the rupee exchange rate will go nuts, and whatever money you have saved for a rainy day will be worth peanuts. Well not actually, because peanuts will also be quite expensive.

There is a silver lining if you really want to see it though. Pregnant women and children under the age of 14 will get free meals. (And you thought we had a population problem?) So the kid might not have fancy stuff or education (too expensive already) or potatoes, but he will have a cereal breakfast, dry roti/bread for lunch and plain rice for dinner.

So how do you gear up for this?

1. I just mentioned the rainy day right?...well its here, or will be within the next 5 years, so start saving prudently. Buy gold. Buy land. Forget the fixed deposits and stocks. If you have the means, invest abroad (any country except Zimbabwe will do)

2. Take pictures of every vegetable you eat. You can show them to your kids so that they can be sure to grab one in case they ever come across one.

3. Save the seeds of any fruit you eat. Plant them wherever you can.

4. Quit your job. Fudging tax returns is too difficult and limited in scope for a salaried person. Do something really productive in the free time. Like growing fruits, vegetables and herbs at home. Convert a bedroom into a greenhouse, you won't need a bed because you will be losing sleep over it all anyways.

5. Start a business and pay yourself a salary that is within the zero tax bracket. Your business may fail due to the stagnating economy, but so will the company you work for currently, same difference. What? Your company is not Indian? Well they might be getting the hell out of here soon so start buttering up that on-site manager for relocation....and start working on a business plan anyway. What? you work for the government? Start networking to get in-touch with government employees in the Food Corporation of India (FCI) who can steal some grains for you....and drop in a mail to me when you do. I'll need some of that.

6. Don't let your kids learn too much. High school should be about enough really. After all, the three highest paying professions in India don't require a degree. Cricketer, Actor or Politician (in decreasing level of skill required) is what your kids should aspire to if they want to stay in the 33%. The last one is most recommended as everything is free for them anyways and generational continuity is almost assured.

Well, I am sure there are plenty more things we can do now that the 'Food' is secure, but you know what, if everyone starts doing these half a dozen things, we're going belly up as a country anyways. So it doesn't really matter what you do does it!?

Finally, I guess I don't have to emphasize the fact that I am going a bit of over the top in this doomsday prophesying, but things aren't really going to be much better than this. I mean I bought 3 smallish apples for 100 bucks today, and they were the cheapest ones in the store. I don't think I will be buying them apples anytime soon.

Farcebook

Apart from the odd drunken status and the funny video, facebook has become quite boring nowadays. Free and overused, it just evokes the been-there-seen-that-pic emotion now. I've observed a few things that piss me off about facebook and like a typical facebooker I decided I wanted to enlist these. If anything it would keep me off facebook for a half an hour.

Everyone stalks, get over it. Stop clicking on links that promise to show you people who've 'checked you out'. For one, there is no such app because that data is not made available by facebook. Secondly, even if there was such an app and you did find out who visited your profile, before you give yourself an ego boost, think of the time when you were bored doing nothing and started clicking on random people and their friends. There's probably a term like 'wall-surfing' or 'profile-browsing' or something. If there isn't, there should be one.

Likes for a pic put up by a girl = 10 x likes for same pic put up by a guy...but thats a given isn't it? 

When people copy paste your status, they will comment something like "Cool! stealing this! ♥" (stupid heart emoticon) or they might tag you in the paste. No guesses for the gender stereotype established here. Why can't you just use the 'via' option you flintstone-ic morons.

People who send friend requests to unknown people are probably under the delusion that facebook friends equate to real friends....oh, and people who block such friend requests are most certainly under that delusion

Every once in a while some topic will go viral and a whole bunch of people will try to display their wit by posting (or stealing) some pearls of wisdom/wit/stupidity till your feed is a constant sludge of putrid pearls

Then someone will post a status saying how fed up he/she is of seeing that topic on his/her feed. Remember, this someone is trying to console his/her ego for not coming up with (or stealing) something on the topic

For non-football lovers having football loving 'friends' like me could well be a pain in the arse. But that's just payback for how it is in the real world. We want to head down to the sports pub to catch the match while you have to insist on dragging us to the movies, well take this barrage of banter, pics, and meaningless/endless arguments. Ha!

If you've just posted a comment on a pic saying 'like! ♥" (stupid heart emoticon again)....congratulations! You just advertised your stupidity! They put a 'like' button there for a reason dumbass!...Don't even get me started on 'supah like! ♥♥'

Sites like Quora are a welcome relief from facebook, until everyone on facebook starts using them

The side-bar of ads was timed perfectly was it not!? They waited for the feeds to become so boring that the ads seem more interesting now

Some people like to deactivate and then re-activate their account often. No there's no wise-ass comment here, I just have no clue why people do that. Just stop using it if you are fed up!

Fake accounts. Who the hell made all those accounts!! There are 13 accounts with my name (no i wasn't doing a narcissistic search)...atleast 12 of them are clearly fake...what the hell! Yeah, check your name now, you will be surprised...

People who 'check-in' the movies they are watching are just feeling guilty about the calls they are not going to pick-up while their phone's on silent

If looks weren't important, facebook wouldn't have been conceived, so take that bullshit notion somewhere else. On a related note, people with actors' pics as their profile pics...you lost the plot there a bit....Also when unknown people ask "Is that your pic?" to the aforementioned people, it is so freaking funny innit! Its like an army of idiots let loose on each other

Respect to those who share interesting and thought provoking articles, videos and pics. But really its a losing battle people. Stuff like P Sainath's "Nero's Guests" goes unnoticed here. Well why wouldn't it, when kolaveri di went viral like it did.

I quite like cribbing on facebook, I also like to see people crib on it. As long as it reduces atleast some of the cribbing I have to do or hear in real life...it's a win-win in my book (pun intended). In fact, if you haven't noticed yet, this list is a crib...about facebook....i should share this on facebook.

Endless debates and rants on someone else's wall also fall into the above category of win-win situations

People 'wishing' everyone 'happy birthday' on facebook...it is so cliche that the only thing more irritating is when the birthday person starts replying to each and every 'wish'. Someone write some code to block that crap from my feed

Facebook messages. For the life of me i can't understand why it doesn't have a bcc option...

When i say i am 'not-attending' an event, why does facebook still keep reminding me about it!?? And how can people add me to weirrd groups that i have absolutely no interest in!??

Having ranted, I think it is still fun to use facebook. Catching up with long lost friends, seeing pictures of new born nephew's and nieces, and friends going places. It isn't an entire waste of time....it does have the potential though. As long as you don't take it all too seriously you should be fine wasting your time on facebook. Unfortunately, of late, the wrong kind of people have started taking it seriously...advertisers, parents and employers.

Arvind and the Wall

"....but the first guy through the wall. It always gets bloody, always. “

That’s a quote from the movie Moneyball. What it means is, whenever there is someone who is out to change the game, out to make a systemic change to how things are done, he will get clobbered. The dialogue goes further to say,

“It's the threat and not just to the way of doing business, in their minds it's threatening the game. But really what it's threatening is, is their livelihoods, it's threatening their jobs, it's threatening the way that they do things. And every time that happens, whether it's the government or a way of doing business or whatever it is, the people that are holding the reins have their hands on the switch.”

There are people who are holding the reins, they are part of the wall, the system. They will oppose any crusader coming to tear down the wall, they will bet that he is crazy. And if you think about the societal wall, the endemic system in our country, you would think its the politicians that hold the rein. But think for a while, why are we leaving out the media? Every scam is a TRP fest is it not? Wouldn’t it be a blow to their livelihood if scams stop? So lets add media to the list. Bureaucrats are on it too, because they might complain, but they profit from it just the same. The intellectuals profit as they have something to discuss on panels. The industry definitely profits, bribes are easier and cheaper than taxes. And by extension of industry, the workforce profits too. I mean, I am paid a salary that I wouldn’t pay myself in my wildest dreams, for a degree that, I agree I worked hard for, but I haven’t even bothered looking at it once since I got it a year back. Funny thing is, I am not even in the higher bracket of salaries that people of my kind get paid. Hell, I am no socialist, I am not advocating pay cuts. We may not be a part of the system, or a part of the wall, but we are surely sitting on it and enjoying ourselves slyly.

What I am trying to say is that, the bricks in the very wall that someone like Arvind Kejriwal is trying to break down, will without doubt tell themselves he is crazy. And spread the word too. They will mock his decision to enter politics. But that is what HE thinks will give him the tools. Will he succeed in bringing the wall down? Hell no. I have no doubts he will fail miserably. The lokpal bill will become a political issue and get blown by the wayside. If anything I think the ruling party are laughing themselves silly over it. All he will end up doing is divide the anti-congress vote further and ensure that they win the seats. Although, he might win a seat or two. 

The first guy through the wall always gets bloody, and many times he may not even get through. But once the wall is dented, once people see that it is coming down, there will be another guy inspired enough to chip away at that dent. Then another and another.  What if the one seat Kejriwal’s party wins is against someone like Digvijay Singh, or Kapil Sibal, or any of the DMK posse. Hell, the way corruption and criminality has penetrated our political class, any victory to his party will be welcome. All he needs to do is inspire more Kejriwal’s. After all we started with one Anna and now have Kejriwal, Bedi, Sisodiya, Bhushan and a handful of others. I see around me, people of my generation changing their attitude towards the system. There are indicators all around us. We may not all join active politics, but more people are appearing for civil services, more people are reluctant to go abroad for work, even someone who refuses to pay a bribe for not wearing a helmet and insists on paying the fine and receiving a receipt is doing something that was unheard of in the previous generation. It may take years for these efforts to fructify into something tangible. I don’t know how many, five, ten, twenty, or maybe even more. But the key is to remember not to condemn the man trying to break down the wall you are sitting on.

The first guy through the wall always gets bloody.

But Sometimes Life....

Lately I've been thinking about life.
How our dreams seem wild and impossible,
when we wake up astounded and bewildered.
But sometimes life is even more unfathomable.

For life, as it unfolds, is like a dream,
dreamed by someone else, chaotic but fair.
We might try to anticipate the next turn,
but sometimes life will catch us unawares.

An exercise in futility it is for sure.
And when things don't turn out our way, we cry and rage .
We try to bind our lives in the shackles of destiny.
But sometimes life is too valuable to be kept in a cage.

They all say take life as it comes.
But I won't say that, it's not always true.
Sometimes you can just sit back and hope.
But sometimes you have to force your way through.

20-Something...and optimistic

Being in your 20’s in India is tough. For several reasons, perhaps too many to enlist in one article, but there’s nothing like having a good whine about it after spending a sleepless night because there was no electricity. The electricity bill for our two bedroom rented apartment, where two people live amounted to a whopping 16,000 rupees for 2 months. That, after 2 hours of daily power cuts, a minimum of 8 hours everyday when no one is at home, and the supply voltage so low during peak hours that none of the appliances work. All this with the hottest summer in five years. I know, I know, everyone is going, ‘Oh what a cry baby, there’s people getting killed, doctors mal-practising, and what not, just watch Amir’s show’. This brings me to the next part of my lament. Television. At this age, I’ve done my studying, I’ve found my calling, or rather stumbled upon it while getting shoved around in The Herd, and when I get home after work, I want to switch on the TV and be entertained. What do I get? Arnab Goswami demanding ‘answers on the behalf of the nation’. I click the remote and there’s Barkha asking Shah Rukh Khan not to be a role model and not to shirk from controversy. After bawling her eyes out and apologizing to everyone in her profession, merely a year back, she’s back in form. So SRK will do good to take her advice. The other anchors are screaming their heads off talking about some Team...Anna or Kolkata, I don’t know, and some Baba...Ramdev or Rahul, I don’t care. I mean, yeah ok, I do care about all that stuff and I carry out my bit of ‘social responsibility’, but I have worked hard enough to have earnt a few hours of entertainment. If I haven’t, my parents’ life of toil should have.

There are no sports on because Neo Sports has the rights to every half-decent sporting event, and I wouldn’t watch that channel even if I had shelled out the extra 100 bucks to subscribe to it. My high speed internet isn’t working because of some technical problems, and I can’t download movies (illegally ofcourse, what’s the point of being in India if I have to buy DVD’s) because the courts have banned the websites. Meanwhile, the internet data recharge I got on my prepaid phone has mysteriously expired before the due date and my phone balance is somehow down to 45 bucks. That’s not sooo bad is it? Well no, except for when I try to call anybody, there’s a highpitched voice telling me that my balance is low....in Tamil. She then informs me the same in English. I could step outside and go for a drive, but after the fuel price hike, recreational burning of petrol is even more indecent than skipping Satyamev Jayate on Sundays.

So I am left to sit there, in the flickering tubelight, sweaty and smelly, (haven’t bathed, no water supply today), wondering whether my parents spent their lives, making sure I was able to spend my youth, giving exams and interviews, for this? Things better start looking up around here, and soon. And as my cynical, whiny, cranky, rant slowly subsides, I kind of start thinking that things will be better. Electricity is back, I call in sick for the day, I make myself tea from milk from a tetrapack carton, I find a hack to access a torrent website once the internet is back up, I recharge my phone online and call the electricity board helpline to lodge a complaint which is received quite surprisingly in a helpful and assuring manner. I am sure none of that happened to my dad when he was 20-something and optimistic.

Best of both worlds

We all give in to a bit of intellectual vomiting now and then. Back in my grad days, these sessions sometimes carried on for entire nights until the ‘fuelled’ bon-fire of thoughts would be extinguished by hunger and other primitive human functions. It was these regurgitations that sometimes resulted in scrawlings on the wall, almost always status messages. In fact I am pretty confident that they would have led to a novel or two had not Chetan Bhagat beat us all too it. That guy ruined the novelty for the rest of us. (Pun intended.) But something that would always surely result from such a session was a blog post. But is that why we used to indulge in them? To write a blog? To announce to the rest of the world that even though we were studying engineering we shouldn’t be considered literarily challenged? Quite frankly, I think it was because we had nothing else to do. Bhagat recently wrote an article (again, I had nothing else to do at that time) for the TOI in which he coined a new term ‘lerd’. I can quite imagine MR. ‘I-do-all-my-writing-on-flights’ smiling smugly to the air-hostess as he was penning this, no doubt basking in the glory of being able to brandish his literary license in the face of innocent readers yet again. Apparently, lerds are the literary students, the social intellectuals. They are the other side of the coin of which nerds, the scientific intellectuals form one face. He then goes on to suggest the failings of each of these groups. He also considers himself a nerd and quite humbly (well, for him atleast) accepts that his ‘rigorous’ scientific studies have rendered him socially inept.

The point is, CB advocates a meeting of minds, a give-and-take between the nerds and the lerds of this country in order to reach solutions to the problems of this country. But reading between the lines, you can clearly see that he is actually invoking a hybrid of the two species. Maybe an engineer? Someone who went on to study the interplay of arts and science that is called management or business administration? Also, maybe someone who led a highly goal-oriented life, like that of a banker, but pursued non-goal oriented dreams, like that of an author? You get the drift; the conceit of CB betrays him in his article. In a nutshell, he seems to suggest that he and his kind are the future of the country. Bhagat knows his readership base quite well and rightly assumes that they will fail to see through the pedestrian screen of words he has put up once again to hide the big flickering neon sign that says ‘ME’.

Now there is some value in what he says in the article, but I don’t think, that the likes of Chetan Bhagat are what this country needs. Let me explain why. To my mind, the hybrid that hesuggests will never give rise to an offspring that has the best qualities of both. In fact, most certainly it will be the mediocrities of both groups. We need to go back to those sessions in grad school to understand why. As I said, the reason for those sessions was that we had nothing better to do. I can look back today and see clearly that those who enjoyed the ‘rigorous’ scientific studies rarely indulged in these vomiting sessions. It was us lot that found themselves disillusioned with what they thought they would be doing in a engineering school that indulged. My lerd friends too would indulge in scientific pursuits only if they found the Sociology 101 akin to chewing cardboard. What happens when a nerd tries to be a lerd? Chetan Bhagat and his notion that he will inspire the youth of India into greatness. Now I am not saying that an engineer shouldn’t write a book, or an arts graduate shouldn’t head an automobile manufacturer. What I am saying is, we shouldn’t even start to assume that we are shaping a country’s future or in fact achieving any other such goals of similar magnitudes. What we are, are nothing but the outcome of a marriage of mediocrity of both worlds.

Now there are some people who are the best of both worlds. And there is a title given to such people. They are called polymaths. They are the likes of Benjamin Franklin, Michelangelo and maybe Steve Jobs, in his own way, was one too. But history suggests that polymaths are not ‘made’, they just ‘are’. And quite clearly, Chetan Bhagat isn't.

Well, maybe that is what Chetan Bhagat meant afterall. Yet again, it takes lengthy rant to fathom that his lenghty rant about how he is a nerd and other blahs, was actually a one liner. India needs some polymaths.

p.s. A word on TOI. The newspaper has well and truly sold its soul now. The sunday editorials page was the only space that still maintained the class and stature of the old days. But now Chetan Bhagat frequently features on it.

What I learnt from manchester united

I never really understood entirely why I follow Manchester United FC like a fanatic. The club website is always open in one of the tabs on my browser. I have set google news alerts that sends me abridged digests of news about Man Utd everyday. I currently own or have owned a plethora of their merchandise and in the last ten or so years, every other thing in my life has changed apart from this devotion to Man Utd. To cut it short, as a fan once put it, "Cut me and I'll bleed red". Which makes it surprising that I haven't written a single article on my blog about manchester united. I probably was trying to write stuff that would appeal to a wider range of readers. Well, I guess thats another thing I don't care anymore for. So, let me write about what i've learnt from manchester united and those not interested can maybe like just not read on. And any scouser can maybe instead watch some reruns of when liverpool won their last league title (did they have video back then though?).

Foremost, I've learnt that there is no better mantra for success than being yourself and being true to you character. Over the years, manchester united has earned as many fans as there have been man utd haters. I think that is the truest test of character. Any pure, honest entitiy will always have lovers and haters in equal measure. The impurities arise when one tries to please-all. You may succeed for a while but it is difficult to carry on, because the lack of integrity will always surface in times of strife and make you realise how hollow you are in truth. (Arsenal fans please note). At manchester united, many times you get the feeling that it is Manchester United vs Rest of the World. Some may look at it as a narcissistic state of existence, and those are the haters, while others feel that there is nothing more glorious and heroic than standing up to the world and saying, "Here I am, you can all try to beat me down, but I will keep coming back, and I will eventually prevail over all of you. Not by winning over your hearts, not by any other sly vendetta. I will do it by brute force and my will to survive against all odds and against all of you put together".

There can be no sentiment in the pursuit of a goal. Decades ago, Manchester United embarked on a quest to be the most successful club in England and then Europe. Along the way there have been many people who were instrumental in shaping the club and there were times when these people had to be let go. Simply because they were no longer going to be helpful in the club's quest for glory. It is truly a masterclass to watch when things like these happen. It is does with the least amount of emotion and almost always the person leaving is looking for any other way that he can contribute. This year's farewells to Neville and Scholes are the cases-in-point here. There is a lesson in managing human resources here. I have rarely seen such loyalty elsewhere.

Lastly, what many perceive as luck, is actually what winners call seizing the opportunity. Luck is never a factor in the long term as it evens out in the end. Manchester United are famous as well as infamous for snatching last-gasp victories, many-a-times through seemingly scratchy and lucky efforts. It is not significant that it manages to happen time and again, what is to be noted is that manchester united repeatedly put themselves in a position where a little bit of luck will turn things their way. They keep chipping away and never give up. A cliched but unpractised life lesson.

EndNote: I hope non-believers took the effort to read the above stuff. I do not intend this to be a eulogy to manchester united. My purpose is to point out that something as everyday as a favourite football club can be a source of inspiration and a pool of life lessons that may have been repeated often but rarely acknowledged and utilised. Look for such sources in your life, you will be surprised by how many there are.

Chennai...

Its been a 2 week association with the place so far. Heat, humidity, language, auto-wallahs, dusty and dirty roads, have all conspired to my stay being a two week long splitting headache. In that order. The moment I stepped out of the flight, I realised what a cauldron I had stepped into. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I am not used to temperatures hovering around the 40's. I've been to rajasthan where the temperatures were similar. But guess what!? Those people know it is hot out there and they take appropriate measures! Not in Chennai though. The tams (yeah, yeah, racist pig!...whatever) seem to be in a constant denial about how insufferably hot it is! Majority of the cabs are still non-ac. We went house searching and it was a sight! The landlords would be fanning themselves or wiping streams and streams of sweat dripping (in chennai, if you don't sweat...you need to check again, you're not in chennai) down their faces while saying, "Saaar, nyo nyeed faar yaa-see saar, twanty four hawars fulla breeze saar". And then follow it up with the killer line, "Geyser present in bathroom saar, haat waater twanty four hawars saar!". I mean, are you freaking out of your mind!? They don't have ac's but they have geysers man! Drop-down-dead stuff that.
 I know, I know...the language problem is hyped enough, everyone knows its a problem here. But, you've gotta be here to believe it! Forget conversation! its impossible to get in a word edgeways, once a Tam realizes you don't speak THE language. I think its a denial thing again. They just can't accept that there is a world out there where people don't speak Tamil. I bet they are like...wow! this guy is just making some random noises, doesn't know how to speak at all I guess, let me hit him with a barrage of words, and hope he latches on to a few. He will just go on and on in a cascade of what almost always seem like expletives. But they're not mind you. They might be the sweetest words in the Tam dictionary, but the way they are spoken, would make Gordon Ramsay's rants seem like a teletubby going "Eh-oh!". Ever heard a Tam speaking on the phone? He will speak so loudly that the phone itself is deemed moot. I bet they would hear each other even without the phone. For example, the guy will be probably talking to his girlfriend right, and after he hangs up, you think, hmm...poor guys seems to have had a fight, all that shouting, girlfriend must've really broken his heart or something. Just then, the guy will turn around, bare super-white teeth and say "hehe...my loower ( yeah! in Tam country its never girlfriend/boyfriend its always 'lover' :-s) and aye are wheespering sweet nothhingsaa".
Cut to the auto-wallahs. Worst I have ever encountered. I was recently bored enough to count the number of cities n towns in India i've had the auto experience. Well over 30 it is. So thats a decently experienced dude saying...the worst auto-wallahs in the country are to be all found in Chennai. It is an economic-logic defying feat out here. The bus transport is probably the best i've seen. That would mean that auto's face lesser demand, so prices should be low. Nope. Economics 101 can go into the dustpan (or one of the open drains that abound chennai). These guys are smarter than your average Keynes and Krugman's. They know, if the bus transport is so awesome, and this dude is coming to me looking for an auto-ride, he must be either desperate to get going or from out-of-town. And take you for a ride he does. As a test, I asked an auto-wallah to take me to a place I knew was walking distance...he asked for 50 bucks. Funny thing is, all auto's have a meter, wonder what it is there for. I guess things will be better once the metro rail projects completes. But  that's like in 2015...and that was before amma came to power.
Well though, before all my tam friends make a lunge for my throat would like to say a few good things about chennai. The people are nice, and genuinely helpful. If you get past the language barrier they can go out of their way to help you, except if you are asking for directions that is. It's not their fault really. In chennai, every place is known by ten different names. And ten people will know one each...none of them know the other nine. So, GPS, lifesaver out here. Food is good and cheap. Honestly, I came with the notion of idlis and sambhars and rasams, but its pretty easy to find chinese (indianised), mughlai (albeit from some southern faction of the mughal family), arabic (shawarma mainly, but decent) and north indian too. You can have your pick in terms of cheap and good accommodation too. In that recent (and that only), chennai kicks some mumbai butt. There is one mall worth going to for a hang-out, but other-wise stay home is what i'd advise. All in all, chennai takes time to grow on you. I haven't got there yet myself.

EndNote: To my tamil friends. Thank you for learning english and hindi, I now know what an effort it might have been, appreciate it.

When nothing is going your way...

Fate plays funny games. I am in chennai for the fourth time in under 2 months, and i never really liked the place. This time i am here for a good 6 months....at least. The last two weeks have been a blur, in fact, all i remember is sitting in cabs rushing to the airport. Spent a lot of time in cabs, rushing from one place to another. All the while wondering, is this what life is gonna be like? A blur of country sides zipping by as i sit in the back seat of a cab, trying to grapple with the weather changes, the headaches, aspirins and working lunches. Heck! this is the sort of lifestyle i craved when i once spend my days hunched up in front of a screen. I was foolish to think i could ignore the Taurus trait in me. The feeling of being grounded and settled is something that I like all taureans will eventually seek and crave. Its not strong enough yet, though the last two weeks have strengthened that craving to some extent. Sometimes the human mind, no matter how independent, seeks and snatches at some sort of anchor. And sometimes, there isn't one available. It is at times like these when you know, nothing is going your way. Your life just zips by like those endless country sides, and you take a back seat, staring blankly at the blur. You just hope that those times don't last too long.

CAUTION: Sharp turns ahead....crazy rant of a cynical MBA

Life rambles on. No, rambles is the wrong word...more like life avalanches on. The last two years were superfast compared to the rest of it. But now, i wonder if it is time to slow down and prepare for the sharp turns ahead. If my performance in the placements out here are anything to go by, it is certainly time to take note of the huge, yellow, "CAUTION: SHARP TURN AHEAD" sign that's been flashing in my head for a while now. In a weird sense, maybe instinctively, i have been preparing for what's to come. Apart from slowing down and taking stock of what things are really important to me, I also reduced some of the baggage I had been lugging around. I certainly feel lighter now. This might seem like gibberish, but heck, I no longer have the patience to explain everything.

It is natural to compare this phase to a similar one previously in my life. It was the time when I had to say goodbye to BIT Mesra, my engineering grad school. The memories of 4 years, the friends, the bakar sessions, the night-outs, the intellectual diarrhea, all flashed before me when I had made the 2 day train journey back home. At that time, I certainly wasn't thinking about the future and what was in store for me. I was just too gutted to be leaving the place that had become home to me, the friends who had become family and the life that had become comfort itself. This time, it is all the other way around. More than thinking about what transpired in the last two years out here, I am just looking forward to making a fresh start to life once this is over. Every new beginning marks the end of a previous new beginning. To think that for the last two years I have been living my dream. Believe me kids, its not necessarily a good thing to have dreams come true. I wonder if other's out here feel the same...or is it just me? But still, I don't want to be a bitter cynic. I guess, ten-fifteen years down the line I will come back to stare emptily at these 'hallowed' corridors and reminisce about the times I spent there. The midnight frisbee, the WAC runs, the ppt runs, the interview runs, life out here did involve a lot of running. And maybe after all it is unfair to compare the two. One gets institutionalized after a period of 4 years. What if I had spent 4 years here...damn, lets not go there! Scary!

At the end of it all, I guess what I am trying to say is that, this is just not the kind of place one misses. I don't think I will look back at this place anytime soon. Some of the people, yes, I will miss them, but there too I look forward to knowing them outside this place...in the real world. It has been called many things, a concentration camp, a cauldron, and what not. I would call it a prep camp. To borrow words from a dear friend, a prep-for-life camp. Because after going through here, nothing in life can ever surprise you. If you can get out of here unharmed, you will face all that life has to offer and conquer it. So yeah, even though I won't miss this place, and I only look forward to the sharp turns ahead; the confidence with which I look forward to negotiate those turns, stems from the bumpy ride this place has afforded me. For that I am thankful. I thank this place for showing me what life is like.

p.s. Planning a fortnight of negotiating 'sharp turns' in a road trip across the western ghats. Really, really looking forward to that. Maybe I should do a travelog...watch this space.

Happy are those...

It's one of those things that keeps cropping up in my mind over and over again. That voice-over dialogue from the move 'The pursuit of Happyness'...he says something like the pursuit of happiness is such a meaningful phrase. How did they know that happiness is something that can only be pursued. They could have said it is the right of a person to be happy, but no, they chose to say that it is the right of a person to pursue happiness. Is happiness not achievable?

At the place that i am, more than an education, i have received hard lessons on life. It has been a growing up process that solidified some notions, gave birth to others, and squashed some of the same ones.

Strength is a function that is independent of external variables: Solidified.  
Trust is temporary and painful: Solidified
Faith is permanent and but blind(and rarely found): Solidified
Happiness can only be pursued: Newly formed
Pain may have no source: Newly formed
Life is a bed of roses with thorns: Solidified
The world is a good place: Squashed
Sadness is temporary and flippant: Unvalidated
Self worth is decided by the highest bid in an auction of people around you: Squashed

...and many more others that I find hard to pen down. All in all though, Life is Good. But sometimes there will be two years in it that let you know it is up to you to keep it that way...

"Happy are those, who realize that the fun lies in the pursuit of happiness and that will go on forever"

A heart full of memories to take from the year...

Its just over a day to go for the most frightening academic year of my life to end. I still have an exam tomorrow, but here i am writing a blog. Will be catching a nap after this...then have a dinner out planned with friends...studying isn't on the cards, today at the least. Was certainly an eventful year, a busy one. I still remember vividly, I was a bit apprehensive for the first few weeks. "Fitting in" has always been a natural priority for me, and it was also the concern topmost on my mind out here. I was worried that I was among the "best minds" in the country n all the other hooplah that the media throws at you about IIMA. Then came T-nite, this was a stretch of 4-5 days where these "best minds" voluntarily make fools out of themselves. Well not all actually, some of them are really really talented...(that's the 'T' in T-nite)...glad to say I did my bit. Would have loved to have done more...but don't we all?
The summer placements were a torrid time for most, fortunately or unfortunately i was lucky with it. The less said about this phase the better. Things became much better after that, and I guess this is where the bonding really set in. Some great friends emerged and as usual the parties, the dinner outs and the movies were back into our lives. Btw...you can get an idea of the party scene out here when I tell you that I was usually the DJ designate :-). But who cares...we have a blast every time we party.
Then came the inter-sectional sports which was fun time all over again. The competitive spirit brought me even close to my friends...and made some new unexpected ones as well :-). Truly enjoyed myself around this time. Whats more our section came pretty close to winning the thing as well, unlike the T-nites ;-).
The last few months have been a blast. This is around the time I think all Wimwians start to appreciate the place...(although we do get a bit sick of all these red bricks around us!). Student body elections, followed by the last term which was by far the busiest. All sorts of crazy assignments and reports to submit. I managed to put in a skit though...again glad I did that.

So all in all a wonderful year. I am sure it was for the rest of the poor souls out here with me. Designing shirts, logos, dressing up as a zoo-zoo, performing a dance, a skit, and playing a few games...oh and also studying my backside off...enjoyed it all. But most of all I loved making some great friends and some MORE than great friends...they have made my time here worthwhile...

@IIMA friends.....We say adieu to this place for now...but we will be back after a 2 months hiatus...wish you all the best of luck for your interns...

The 'F' word...

It's been a tough, tough last 7-8 months being an 'F'. In fact, a friend, a fellow 'F', called it one, big, extended week. Life has come a long way in the past year or so. I was still an awkward, shy yet confident guy this time last year, now I am a .....hey! wait a minute! I still am all that...to top it, the confidence has probably taken a dent or two. First year at IIM A is just about a month away from getting over (if i see it just once, that is), and I am the same? I mean after all, it has been called a lot of things, even a concentration camp. But I wonder if it was all that bad at all. I do look forward to no longer being called the dirty 'F' word though....by the way that's F for Faccha. Now, don't get me wrong guys, this isn't some little word play I am doing. 'Faccha' is almost an abuse out here. Probably the only one where the person actually said it with a tinge of sympathy and dollops of pity, but the receiver still felt abused, violated also :-). But was it really a concentration camp? Did we go to hell and back again? Not really. One of the amazing profs out here had remarked,"If you are not in the top 20 or the bottom 5, you don't have to worry about your grades, do you!?". I couldn't put it in a better way. Not to say that I never let it all get to me. There were times when I felt like getting away from it all, and even did (felt much better after that!). Yeah, it was a great learning experience (cliched but true!!), but most of it came outside of the numerous case-mats, the endless handouts, and bulky textbooks (No, notes don't figure in my scheme of things). The learning came from the in-class gossip with the guys sitting near me, the chai sessions at Rambhai's stall (hole-in-the-wall), and mostly from the great friends I've made out here.

Word of advice for future Facchas...I guess Dead Poet's Society explains how to go about it well enough. We gotta suck the marrow out of life, for when we come to leave this place, we shouldn't realize that we have learned nothing that a pile of books wouldn't teach. All the same, when you do that, don't choke on the bone! Get the assignments done, prepare for class (err...hypocrisy disclaimer out here :-P ) and then, only then do other stuff...like writing blogs.

I yam what i yam...

In the mood to bash up a beaten up topic today...The one on my mind actually is the question of origins, roots, and the whole "where-you-from?" saga. Being born a maharashtrian, then brought up in goa, spending 4 of the most influential years in jharkhand, and back to maharashtra for a couple has not helped me any in getting a single word answer to the question. And so many others must know what its like, that i cant help but ramble about it. Well the diktat of glamour, charm and well...'comfort'...makes me lean towards being a Goan. But having talked the talk and walked the walk of a maharashtrian, i wouldnt mind proclaiming "Mi Marathi" either. Jharkhan i leave out of the now two pronged race...albeit reluctantly. Its there that most of the best memories of my life are from. Great...so now we have 'sun-n-sand' Goan vs 'pride-n-culture' Maratha. If the average reader by now isnt searching for my number to call me up and tell me to get a life, well i agree its a trivial issue. The disclaimer is that this rambling is purely academic and germinates mainly from the desire of being able to answer the question "where-you-from?" in a single word and get on with it. Within the myopic reaches of the country one faces this question so often that i feel the need sometimes to whip out a quick answer. Outside, the word 'India' would proudly suffice. Till then, maybe i should just learn to live with it and focus on more pressing "what-are-you?" issues...such as arrogance, stupidity and a bloated ego.

Its you alone...

You look back lost in time,
and you laugh to hide, to confine.
The memories that should be there no longer,
so unsuspecting souls, oblivious, grow fonder.

Hurt and happiness, both rush back together,
all they can offer, is but a mere gesture.
They'll just grow, with the days gone by,
what can they do? Laugh? Comfort? Or cry?

It's you alone who can look forth,
for the past is the dusk that we loath.
Forget the cliche and decide,
to have a hope, a smile and fight.

So much to live, to learn, to share,
with me and others, and all that care.
To come is a glowing morn,
but its you alone, who can move on.

To crave, to find

A simple joy, I crave to find,
Some quiet please, a mellow breeze,
A break serene, from constant grind,
A mind at peace, a heart at ease.

I crave to find, a time divine,
A sudden laugh, a stray tear,
A twinkle in the eye, that set on mine,
A soothing touch mere, I shall forever revere.

The dawn beckons, to attain I strive,
Their signals warn, its not our kind,
It's they who fear, my endeavor will be deprived,
But...my mind is made...to crave...to find.

Avatar (Ek Adbhud Duniya)

In case you are wondering whats that in the brackets in the title, its the name of the hindi dubbed version of the new 3D release, Avatar. James Cameron is no newbie when it comes to special effects. Titanic and Terminator 2: Judgement Day being his previous claims to CGI fame. With Avatar he seeks to repeat the performance and infact take it to a new dimension (literally! since the movie is 3D). There's a problem though....there aint no story. It is heard that the story germinated some 13 years back and the movie completed only now as the advances in animation technology would not support a movie of this stature that long ago. Well now onto the movie.

I went to the movie with a whole bunch of close friends. The disclaimer here is that i was never big on these kinda movies that i call the 'Jaadu-Tona' genre :P. LOTR and Harry Potter being exceptions. So it was with a pinch of salt that i decided to go along. Knowing that it is rather the company i would enjoy than the movie itself. The movie has the standard story line...Spy, girl, girl's father, love, allegiances, fight, victory of good over bad. Now that took well into 3 hours to depict. Seriously, if i wanted to just watch the awesome graphics and the breathtaking display of lights...i would watch the scenes on youtube. The 3D glasses were more of a nuisance than anything. I mean try balancing heavy plastic sharp objects on your nose for 3 hours and then tell me about it. It gave me a headache frankly. However, credit where its due, when i did wake up from my slumber and watched the ending fight sequence, a few scenes actually made me strafe to avoid oncoming bullets and arrows. Other than that there is nothing to really write home about in the movie. Although the end result was a superb visual treat, it was like watching a firework display for 3 hours. You get bored somewhere down the line and you neck starts to stiffen. So you take off those silly glasses that have been giving you a headache, thank god that you are in the corner seat, and dose off wondering whether you could have put the 3 hours to better use. The best part of the movie was when it got over. Atleast the movie gave us enough conversational topics like poking fun at the alien kissing scene (which was seriously not required) and tall friends being likened to the Pandorans. A couple of my pals even did some research to fathom the meaning of the whole thing. Me? I havent thought of the movie since, i have exams coming up.

kabhi na beete chamkeele din

I wrote the below passage when still working at amdocs, i had just appeared for CAT 2008, and didnt know what was in store :-P...... 

"Dil chahta hain....kabhi na beete chamkeele din

Hum na rahein kabhi yaaron ke bin...."


Its a sunday evening...and here i am, trying to fathom why on earth the customers of my client arent able to get their minutes of usage this month....and i put on my headphones...sometimes music helps you in getting your thoughts in order...and shankar mahadevan started crooning the above words into my ears...An alarm went off in my head...i couldnt help but stop and stare blindly into my screen...I gave up with the problem...it didnt matter anyway...it was an extremely low priority issue and i could solve it with some help later on...I thought of doing something i enjoy....blogging...Its been months since my last post...and i was beginning to wonder wether i have lost the creativity, the imagination to go ahead and write another article. But here i am....on a Sunday evening...trying to give it another shot...


I have been reading quite a bit these days...I got hold of '3 Mistakes of my Life' chetan bhagats 3rd book...he he he...i thought "Mate, you've done 2 mistakes and we know about it...why make a third one!"...naah kidding...Bhagat's an awesome read...not so crazy about One Night at the Call Center but of course "5 Point..." is unbelievable. But you know what!?...ive got a friend who never stayed in a hostel and works in a call centre feels exactly the opposite. Relative scales of measurement at work...we like the books that we can relate to. By the way, I also read 'Joker in the Pack' its a story about a guy and his days in IIM Bangalore...Now, that is something i would like to relate to! ...maybe i will someday! who knows...it aint over until its over eh?!...The moot point is, when will that day come when we say "kabhi na beete chamkeele din"...well those chamkeele din seem to be past us all...but why?!!..why do i brood over the past and reminisce in the lost glory of years gone by!?...why cant the 'shaams jhoom' and the 'raats gaa' once more? :-)..can they?...Ofcourse they can, one has gotta make 'em. I have a dream...i pursue it with all my might...if i fail what the heck!...i gave it a shot!...i will enjoy the pursuit...i will make it the purpose of my life...life is too short to stop at signals...i need to keep moving on...Its a Sunday evening...and here i am...ready to move on...start a new week.


hoping that this will inspire me to give it a go...and you all...

hoping we'll take charge of our lives and give our best shot at acheiving our forgotten goals...

...ah! Thank God I had saved this :-D...Hopefully readers (and especially this years' CAT aspirants) can relate :-D

Who's life do you want to live?

Recently I was lucky enough to see a video of a lecture by Kiran Bedi on leadership, and how we can, from a young age, inculcate in ourselves the qualities and the visionary abilities of a leader. She begins by talking about Destiny, and how it is a factor in deciding the course of our lives. She does actually put forth a very compelling argument, and one that I have believed in even before letting my thoughts be anchored by her views. Our birth into the families we were born into is definitely destiny at work. I am too, glad I was born to my parents, who made several sacrifices and indeed dedicated their whole lives to their children. So yeah, to some extent fortune does favour the brave and our deeds do decide our rewards, but no one can deny that the initial boost that one gets (or does not), is down to pure luck...or destiny. The real heroes are those who despite all the misgivings still triumph in life. Hats off to those who didnt have the kind of parents and family that I have been lucky to have, and hats off to those parents and families such as mine. As for me, I continue to thank my lucky stars.

On why the song in you heart should be on your lips too

May to November...helluva long time considering i have blogging as one of my interests mentioned on my CV. Speaking of CV's, thats what has been the talk of the town (or rather the campus) out here with the summer placements in full flow. But the thoughts i am about to pen down aren't about summer placements and about IIMA, they address a much larger frame of reference. The thoughts were inspired while listening to my favorite song... "Phir dekhiye..." from rock on. The lyrics say something about..."hoton pe jiske...koi toh geet hain...woh haare bhi toh uski hi jeet hain..." Oh i would so love to live life like that!! With a song on my lips and the feeling of not caring about consequences...and people who know me before IIMA will probably think that i sold my soul to be the studious busybody i am out here. On the other hand my dorm mates are of the opinion that i always sleep, watch movies, play FIFA and in general loaf around. Well all i can say is that the difference is merely the frame of reference. Ofcourse i am not the same lazy, careless person i was before...but by the standards here i am. Is this post sounding too narcissist? pardon me if it does. My point is, why do we find it so hard always to find our true calling? Why do we feel the need to "prepare" ourselves so that we "perform" well on a given occasion? I mean when does one feel satisfied? The personal expectations never cease do they?...The only way to be happy, content and satisfied is to follow the oft repeated but seldom followed adage of  "Goddamit just Be Yourself"

For those who followed the ramblings above...good for you!!
For those who didnt and want to enter into an argument with the author...go watch October Sky(again and again)...listen to "Phir Dekhiye" from Rock On (again and again)...and dont bother the author before doing those things